How well you've done so far

Dear Madeline,

It's been almost 2 weeks since I last wrote to you. It's not for a lack of wanting. Rather, you've really been ruling the roost lately. Between your teething pain that's been keeping you up all hours of the night and my getting back to work, I really haven't been bringing my "A game."

Last week we marked your 9-month birthday, and as your present to Mom and I you tolerated your chemotherapy remarkably well. We really didn't see the same sort of downside I've come to expect. Maybe the pain of your new teeth pushing down on your gums helped to distract you from how bad you would have otherwise felt after chemo. Still, your smiles and desire to have things your way shone on through. You played on the floor, hung out in your walker and generally remained in a decent mood for most of the week. Except until the sun went down. Then it was a different story entirely.

You've been giving Mom and I all sorts of grief at night lately. Maybe it's jaw pain or joint pain from the chemo, maybe it's the teething, but we've struggled to help you stay asleep for any longer the 45 minutes most nights now. If it is your teeth, the teething gel we can give you helps only for a few minutes. We can't give you ibuprofen or acetaminophen because, while those would help with your pain, they'd mask any fevers and any sign of trouble that would otherwise result in a trip to the ER (or more). Those little teething tabs we tried before the hospital made you gag.

We finally resorted the other night to giving you some of your remaining prescription pain medicine to give you (and us) some relief for a few hours. We'll check with the doctor tomorrow to see if that is something we can keep up. If not, well, it's going to be a rough next 195 nights (give or take) until your treatment protocol is done and something tells me you'll still have plenty more teething in store before and after that day comes.

In more optimistic news, your appointment last week went very well and you still have plenty of hair. Now I'm starting to wonder if you will lose any at all! I'm hoping you carry that forward throughout your treatment.

Lots of blood work and another chemotherapy double-feature (dactinomycin - which would have a drug interaction with the OTC pain relievers we'd love to be able to give you for your teething - and vincristine) await you tomorrow. We're praying for good news all the way around and that you handle the after-effects well. We'll be with you through it all, no matter which way it goes.

Love,
   Daddy

P.S. Only 3 more treatments after tomorrow until a 2-week break from the chemotherapy!